Big girls need lovin' too

I feel guilty for openly saying this: I am really addicted to shitty reality dating shows. And when I say addicted, I mean I am absolutely consumed with "coming up next week" and gossiping with my co-workers about the drama that shall ensue. Honestly, I cry in the shower afterwards because I feel so awful for having enjoyed it.

It's come to the pathetic point where these terribly guilty pleasures are marked on my calendar and they provide notification reminders to call all of my roommates to gather and chuckle at these sad people's misfortunes. It is no secret that I love the exploitation of the average American seeking stardom; and honestly if they (meaning the contestants) signed up for it willingly, then I have been given the Golden Ticket to laugh, and judge them openly. After all, they wanted it that way. No one just accidentally signs a 50 page waiver and bio and then has the right to say "I didn't know they were going to show me like that!?!"

At the very top of the list of the greatest reality dating shows on TV right now has got to be More to Love. This complete mess of a series (of course, televised on FOX) centers around Luke Conley, a large and lovable ex-football player who is in search of his perfect woman. The show follows an almost identical premise as The Bachelor except for one catch: each girl on the show is what is reffered to as a BBW - for those of you who have never accidentally stumbled across this awful part of a porn site, this means a Big, Beautiful Woman. The "smallest" of these ladies tips the scale at around 170 ("she got fat after high school, she didn't know what it was like to be fat growing up" - one of the other contestants) while the largest was in the 270's. I can only think of a couple famous women that enjoy Jack-in-the-Box at 3am more than this herd:

Below is a list of the show's female contestants and each of their "stats" so to speak. This reads less like a dating show cast and more like a list of professional female bowlers and the averages they carry:

Now don't get me wrong; I have nothing against big women or bigger people. I, myself, am known to carry around some winter warmth, yearround. HOWEVER, it is the actions and reactions of these women that are truly unbelieveable. Since most have never been on actual dates, they resort to spilling each detail of their lives almost instantaneously and at times Luke functions more as Dr. Phil than Dr. Single. (although I imagine most girls wish he was Dr. Pepper).

They met on FoodHarmony.com

There are just so many great aspects about this show. In order to fully understand the trainwrecks that are vieing for one man's love, you need to feast your eyes the casting call video posted online. Each episode is packed full of women weeping into the confessional camera, crying on topics ranging from men not liking them to not having prom to being jealous of the other girls. It happens so often and so regularly that I believe John Daly has started betting on it. Overall, the dates are awful, the women are complete wrecks and the show itself is a hilarious mess. It's hard to watch these women blame their dating misfortunes on their weight; in actuality, they aren't finding the man of their dreams because they are whining, caddy, angry, malicious, crazy bitches.

If you haven't taken any time to watch More to Love (or as i call it, the Andrew Feel Better About Myself Hour) PLEASE do yourself a favor and watch. You can follow this link to access the episodes and catch up each Tuesday night at 9 p.m. to see how their rolls unfold (haha). Overall, this is as good as reality TV gets.


What I am laughing at right now: In my post from Monday I referenced how good Northeast Ohio looked after all the positive coverage this past weekend. The following ACTUAL NEWSCAST from Cleveland Fox (do you see a shitty TV trend here?) affiliate WJW Channel 8 News is truly re-cockulous. Apparently, Cleveland is now known for it's high murder and unemployment rates and man-eating cardboard bears.